Apparently, the president and my wife frowned upon my last post.
I can respond to a couple more questions, and then I gotta take two weeks off to "reflect upon my actions" --- so sayeth the guy that played hoops this weekend while all of Nevada just applied for part-time work at Orange Julius.
Whatever. At least I'm not that Wikileaks schmuck. Thanks for giving me a ton of extra work to do, asshat. I've had to apologize to Bersculoni all morning. Gonna have to introduce him to Megan Fox to calm him down. Whete did I put her email address?
Mike from Sacramento, let your wife wear Uggs. I know, I know. They're ridiculous and make no sense. But happy wife, happy life. But remember this: while you're dealing with her, I've gotta talk down Kim Jong Il.
How the heck am I supposed to talk to him via back-channels when he reminds me of the Chinese guy from "The Hangover?"
I just wanna fly over there, storm in his office, and treat him like Sonny Corleone's brother-in-law. Oh, I'd bite his knuckles in the middle of Brooklyn.
Carol from Charlottesville, Virginia, I actually hate the show "House." Here's every episode:
1. Patient shows up with what could be 17 different diseases.
2. A ton of smart people don't know what to do.
3. House is a disagreeable, smug bastard.
4. He flirts with his girlfriend.
5. The guy from "Dead Poets Society" gets all high and mighty.
6. House needs pills.
7. Surgery's about to begin.
8. House stops the surgery. The patient just needs her tonsils removed. Thanks, House!
Take my advice, Carol: Check out "The League" on FX. One character is named Taco. Taco! LOL.
You want advice? I got it. Except about sex. This ain't Cinemax, folks.
Dude! I mean Joe - you watch The Real Housewives of New Jersey?
ReplyDeleteHell to the yes.
ReplyDeleteI like that our president plays basketball, Joe. We have a long history of golf-playing presidents and it's time that chain was broken. Are you saying he shouldn't be playing basketball at all? I can't believe that he would play basketball ALL weekend. For one thing, that would probably mess up his knees, and for another, he seems too nice a guy to do that while American families are deciding they can't afford brown mustard.
ReplyDelete